Saturday, March 28, 2020

Laser Moon (1993)


 5 REASONS TO WATCH LASER MOON





1. SURPRISINGLY DISAPPOINTING SCI-FI WEAPON

There's a masked killer murdering innocent women with a "high-tech weapon" as they tell on the dvd box to sell the movie. This weapon might be the least thrilling sci-fi weapon apparatus in movie history.





2. SURPRISINGLY DISAPPOINTING SHOWER SCENE

The movie opens with "TRACI LORDS IN" following a cool movie title "LASER MOON", and going straight to a shower scene...

...but it's not Traci in the shower. In such a subtle way they actually managed to make a nude scene disappointing. That might be the first in movie history.




3. TRACI LORDS

As mentioned, at the very least the movie stars Traci Lords so there's that odd sense of curiosity going for the movie.

And even she is bored and disappointed about the whole thing.





4. CRAZY NEGATIVE SHOTS

There's this guy who kinda looks like Giovanni Lombardo Radice's character in City of the Living Dead. He's going all crazy and he has a habit to cut nude pictures of women from magazines. 


Then suddenly all is shown in negative colors to probably show how crazy the dude is.


I like to think though that they noticed there were quite a bit of "naughty bits" showing in the pictures and they don't want to cut down the running length of the film so they figured this is the way to hide them.




5. PLOT TWIST

There's this radio host who talks and talks and talks and goes on and on and on. The talk sequences seem endless and while it's fun to watch all the equipment around the room, even that gets eventually boring when nothing goes nowhere.
 But suddenly there's a moment where the movie is brought from the slowest boredom to the highest excitement for a few seconds. The movie might have one disappointment of a sci-fi weapon but it's got a great sci-fi plot twist, both of which make no sense whatsoever. I don't know what the hell that weapon is supposed to be and I don't know what the hell is happening but it's really cool!

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